Not A Love Story. no.3
Right person, wrong time?
What does it mean when you feel in your bones that you have found the right person, but it's just not the time? How can something as simple as a moment in time rip all of those indescribable feelings away? I am half convinced this phenomenon we’ve termed “right person, wrong time” is an excuse for us to justify our broken feelings. Then, one day, I met the right person, and four years later, here I am with the other half of me, who believes the right person is accurate, and that maybe timing will decide your fate.
A conflict that has brought me to one conclusion that takes neither side.
I think there are people out there who are right for us, and when our hearts break, we lose the love we were clinging to, and we are left with confusion and shattered pieces. I think we are inclined to protect our feelings and are left to say that it was just the wrong time. We defend our feelings for that person, the time we committed, the work we put in, and blame it on timing. Timing is not our fault; it’s not their fault. Bad timing is the external reason that causes you pain. It was not your own doing; it was not their wrongdoing; time is something to blame that makes everything hurt a little less.
As I grow further from my heartbreaks and log some more time under my belt, I’ve learned to accept that maybe that person served their time and purpose to me. Accepting that maybe there is no “wrong time” is less detrimental for my future than the lingering feelings clinging to the possibility that one day it will be the right time. I think they were the right person for the person I was with them, for the person I was at that time. Removing the idea that time is the only thing keeping them from you will free up a lot of energy you would have spent wanting, yearning, and waiting.
Breakups are breakups, and they hurt no matter the reason. Telling yourself it's the wrong time will only delay the pain a little while longer. One day, you’ll wake up and realize you are no longer recognizable to the person who loved you, nor are you recognizable to the girl who loved them. They were the right person for the time being.
To the contrary. I loved and lost, but I have also known and come to love with divine timing. I met someone four years ago, and I said to myself, “he would be my boyfriend in another lifetime.” Four years down the line, that lifetime is now, and it is mine. Time is a funny thing, and maybe I am willing to give time the humorous credit of bringing me the love that has my blood dancing circles around my heart.
What does it mean when you feel in your bones that you have found the right person, but it's just not the time?
I’d like to think that it means all those feelings have a greater purpose for the future. Love is the greatest thing someone can expirence in their lifetime, something we continuously sacrifice everything for. I believe that a great love will, without fail, beat the wrong time. If it was meant to be, it would have been. Bad timing would not have had a chance to survive the suffocation of two people who want to be together. If it is meant to be, it will be. Time’s only role is to remind you to be grateful for what was and what is, not to be the harrowing boulder to keep you from someone who is not dead.
